In light of the recent Suicides of several Gay Teens, I have decided to dedicate this blog to them. Rest in Power, Young Troubadours. Even in this life's sleep, you have inspired many to action on your behalf. My heart Breaks for you even as I Celebrate you.
*SILENCE*
To anyone that reads this that is feeling as they felt... Baby, It Does Get Better. I have been gay bashed, I have been spat at, I have been called more names than I can remember... Starting in Middle school. And like a good little suburban boy, I tried to ignore all the teasings, the taunts; my own feelings. But I got older. I grew up, and I realized that there is a thriving world that loves me; that there are a million different people who dig me for just being me. I have discovered in my life that I have a mission, a purpose. The ME that I am is no accident. Everything that I have experienced is by my own life's design, to provide me with the best, most conscientious ammunition to be able to grow into the most positive, productive, loving, and fabulous me that I can.
I don't know you, but I, too, love you. You too have a marvelous gift to offer the world, even if you have NO idea what that is yet. That's just the details. As my Mother used to say, "Baby, Keep Livin'." You will be amazed at just how wondrous your life truly is. It's a BIG world out there, and if you can just hold on, You will surprise yourself at how strong you will become to get thru it.
You may not believe this now, but the day will come when you need to twirl, or not, and someone will be there to applaud you. Times change, and the day will come when sexuality is viewed with the same nonchalance as fashion, or food choices. What you eat and what you wear are your personal choices. But that fact that you've a cabinet full of Ramen Noodles ain't gone stop you from eating, right? It's YOUR Food. So eat up! And while some will absolutely LOVE how you serve up your chicken dinners, some people will prefer to wear your chicken dinners. (i.e., Lady Gaga's meat dress)
You feel me, Children? Now I don't if you are or aren't an uber-queen, just salivating to wear your first ball gown and tiara, (and there is absolutely nothing wrong if your goal for the next year is to win Mother RuPaul's Drag Race!), Nor are you all super studs waiting to go ultra butch, sag and use your brother's clippers, but I do know that all over-the-top stereotypical gay models don't necessarily fit some of you, and that, too, is perfectly fine. That doesn't make you any less or more a member of the tribe, and gives you neither less, nor more of a right to hide yourself from yourself.
I recently ran into a large group of young queers. Possibly, 18-22, at best. They were cutting up, queening out and just being in general... very... j'ne c'est quois? Well, hell, they were being Loud, Young, and Gay. Now I am of the mindset that that foolywang bullskit has it's place, and amongst your friends, Do What You Do! But just being ignorant for the sake of ignorance just makes you look stupid. Having pride in yourself is about carrying yourself with your utmost best self, putting the best you out for the world to see. Now there are times when we all do the goofy, but I digress.
I pulled the Young Queens and Studs to the side, and gave a brief little tutorial on the Life. Like anything else, honey, the Life has it's rules, it's players, and it's boundaries. Learn them, and learn them well. Anywho! I pull the Young Queers to the side for a little Chit Chat, and they say to me, "We won't be gay forever, we're Christian. we're just doing this for a little while..."
Hmmm...
This brings me back to my original point: No one. No Person, No Situation, No Setback, No Obstacle can EVER determine Who You Are. I am not a Christian, though I was raised one. I practice Nichiren Buddhism, meaning I chant Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. Yes, just like Tina Turner in What's Love Got To Do With It?. I chant because this practice doesn't discriminate. It doesn't tell any person no matter who they are that they are incapable of accomplishing anything that they envision for their lives. Including being in a happily committed relationship with someone of the same sex. This Buddhism, at its core is about each person fulfilling there own dream of unshakable, unflappable happiness; even in the face of life's challenges.
Now I am fully aware that often the mindset of the Church is damnation and hellfire for all LGBTQIA people everywhere, and people can pull out that Leviticus quote til the cows come home, but Jesus loved everyone. No matter who they were, where they from, or who they were sleeping with (Ahem. Mary Magdalene). Hallo? Then of course, there is the story of the beggar woman who touched Jesus hem, and exclaimed: "Oh Thank You Jesus! You Healed Me!"(or something very near to that) To which Jesus replied: "Woman, your faith hath healed you." God said to love thy neighbor, but to love thy neighbor, You got to Love Yourself. Mama Ru says it all the Time! "If you cain't love yourself, how in the Hell you gon' love somebody else?!" I didn't come here to preach about the merits of religion, I use this context to simply illustrate the point that nothing about your present is set in stone, baby. You can change it! It will get better. The rough times will subside, and you WILL find your Happy!
You just have to let that seed grow. Have faith in your own strength. When that seems weak, seek a hand. Seek a friend. If you're feeling like their are none around, just as sure as you can read this blog, you can go to a website dedicated to Gays and Gay Youth.
The Gay Youth Corner: www.gyc.com
QA: Gay Youth Community: www.queerattitude.com
Bonus Round Gay Youth Page: www.bonusround.com/gayyouth/ :An Invaluable resource.
In most large cities, there is some type of gay youth friendly place to go. Even if you have to sneak away to get there, if it saves your life, if it can save someone else's... Just Go. For more information, click the titles for the links.
In Chicago:
The Howard Brown Broadway Youth Center:
3179 N. Broadway Chicago, IL
(773) 935-3151 x 0
The Center on Halsted
3656 N. Halsted Chicago, IL
773.472.6469
In New York:
The Center: The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center
208 West 13th Street
New York, NY 10011
The Center is between 7th and 8th Aves (map)
Phone: 212-620-7310
In Los Angeles:
L.A. Gay Center
www.lagaycenter.org
Youth Program info: http://bit.ly/ctItCg
Trust Yourself Enough to LOVE Yourself
Yours will be a storied Generation.
Friday, October 1, 2010
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